Eating tour ends in semi-tragedy

In celebration of my last night in the city, Big and I took a nap and then rallied to go out at 11 PM. We're a classy pair. We didn't go out to a bar or club. We went to the "trendiest" Barnes and Nobles of them all. On the way, I pointed to the CNN building and told her that's where I'd someday work. She said, "Hotel Empire?" which was the building right next door. This is, of course, in reference to the jobs I've been finding on craigslist. If you try hard enough, there are plenty of job opportunities in New York. I could be an escort or a dominatrix. The possibilities are endless!

After going on a few other adventures (to Walgreens where Big cried about how inferior Duane Reade is in comparison), we journeyed to Big Nick's. The whole time, Big has about 30 conditioner bottles because she found an Herbal Essences conditioner that had been discontinued that Walgreens was still selling. She bought their entire stock.

We went to Big Nick's where we decided to make up for our day of not eating (because we had been napping for this big night out) by consuming our recommended daily calories. Big got two vegetarian hot dogs and I got a piece of pizza and sweet potato fries. We ate everything. And then decided we wanted pie.

We ran across the street to Manhattan Diner. Big got apple pie with ice cream and I got cheesecake. The apple pie was warm and the crust was flakey and soft and soaked up all the ice cream without losing substance. The apples were sweet and gooey and the whole thing was just like biting into the American flag it was so good. I have never had better cheesecake in my life. It was light and airy and nothing like the dense globs I've previously consumed. My fork cut through it like butter and it was creamy and flavorful and it was literally like drinking something delicious. Like drinking a bucket of cream and flavor.

Well, cream and flavor and grease do not a good ending make. I think I have food poisoning.

Perhaps because pandas are Asian too, but I feel as if what I am experiencing is similar to what they go through when they shove tons and tons of bamboo into their cute black and white panda mouths. If it's even a fraction of what they endure, I'm not surprised they're all endangered.