How to look cool when you're unemployed

Here is how to look cool in the grocery store when you're unemployed and in a t-shirt and everyone else your age is in classy professional gear:

1. Shop in the gourmet food aisle. Contemplate the difference between organic products. Hold two fancy looking items in your hands and pretend to care about the nutrition information and the calorie count.

2. Sip on your Starbucks latte (extra shot of espresso, soy milk, and sugar-free vanilla) while you browse the fresh fruit.

3. As you are walking out the automatic glass doors, whip out your sunglasses and put them on.

4. Walk into the glass pane because the door is to the right, the pane is to the left, and you didn't realize that only one side slid open. Drop bags of groceries, break sunglasses. Look like an idiot.

5. You look even cooler because your sister works there and all her friends know who you are.